Stupid CoWorkers

Let me start by saying that nowhere in my job description does it say anything about moving furniture for people in my office yet ever since I’ve started I’ve gotten the pleasure of having to do this many times. It’s especially rewarding since the people I work with are not parapalegic or handicapped in any way and are just as capable as me of moving their own sh*t. I get a call yesterday from an employee who wants to move her computer to her new desk. Since this is kind of odd I ask her why she wants to move it, “Because mines newer.” That’s right “mines” newer. But I digress. Due to an incident where I was reprimanded and told by my boss that it’s not my job to move furniture I’ve been a little hesitant to move anything so I told this person nicely that’s its not my job but I’d help since it’s not worth paying our physical plant staff the OT to move it. I get a call the next day from one of her new bosses asking how come I haven’t moved it yet. How ’bout because I never said I would. I calmly explained my position and when asked what we could do to move it responded with, “what’s wrong with your arms?” Now today I get a voicemail from my boss telling me that this other woman’s boss called him to complain that I didn’t want to move it and he understands that I’m not the department’s day laborer but would I mind doing him a favor and moving it. Well you know what, I would, especially since no one is going to help including the people that want the PC there soooo bad. I’m so glad I wear a shirt and tie to work everyday just so I can get filthy carrying your f’ng PC. F*ckers.

Stupid CoWorkers

“Let me start off by identifying the characters (not their real names):Mr. Diva [Dean]Piggy [Office Manager/Executive Asst.]Fat Ass [Administrative Asst. to the Dean]

During my first semester of graduate school, while pursuing my Masters, I decided to take up a part-time job as a Graduate Student Assistant in one of the depts at a university in Northern California. When I first started the job, I had a cubicle all to myself and I thought things were going well. I enjoyed working with everyone (one of the reasons I remained for at least a year). I started out with $10/hr. and I thought it was adequate pay since I never worked before while in school and just wanted to be less financially dependent on my parents so I was cool with getting 10 bucks an hour.

Anyway, as I continued working in the position, they moved me to the Receptionist’s desk, so Fat Ass could have her own cubicle. My duties were to answer the phones and help out students as they came into the office while doing random things. Then Piggy, who is in charge of Fat Ass, started to assign me absurd tasks such as vaccuming Mr. Diva’s office, cleaning vases in the office’s kitchen, and dusting bookshelves. At one point there was a student assistant in the same position as me, who was an undergrad but was getting paid more than me, even though I was there longer. This student assistant, Ariel, would tell Fat Ass “no” when asked to vaccum. Ariel said she was embarrassed that she had to vacuum because she was better than that. I definitely agreed. Well, Ariel lasted 2 months…After Ariel left, they decided to hire another undergrad student assistant (Hope). Hope was also getting paid more than me, and Hope and I used to fume about Fat Ass and Piggy all the time. Piggy started to give us a list of tasks we had to get done by the end of each day as if we were in elementary school. On and off, Piggy and Fat Ass continued to ask us to clean Mr. Diva’s office because when Mr. Diva came back from his international trips, he didn’t like to see dust. What the hell did they think we were? JANITORS!? One day I volunteered to help Piggy with hanging pictures in Mr. Diva’s office, and Piggy told me that Mr. Diva specifically said he wanted everything to be at least 3 feet off the ground. All of a sudden, Mr. Diva became a f**kin’ interior designer overnight. Eventually, Hope had enough too of Piggy’s requests and quit.

I didn’t complain about the salary discrepancy until I was in the position for at least a year and my other coworkers in the office all knew how unhappy I was. My coworkers also didn’t like Piggy and Fat Ass and thought they would always go on a power trip and one of my coworkers pointed out that I was one of the few who have remained in that position for more than a semester. I was pissed with the whole salary discrepancy because here I was about to get my Masters degree and have been in the position longer than all the previous student assistants but getting paid less. At the same time, they were asking me to wash dishes, vaccum, and cleaning the storage room while doing my regular office tasks. My goal wasn’t to be an office bitch and if I had wanted to, then I would have applied to be an office bitch. My coworkers tried to help me to get a raise by giving Piggy and Fat Ass hints, but they weren’t too concerned. I even told Fat Ass directly that I wanted a raise.

Having spent a year in the position, I submitted my resignation letter after Hope quit, basically telling them that I was moving on and I was worth more than 10 f**kin’ bucks an hour. Then Fat Ass and Piggy tried to get me to stay by constantly fawning me. Fatt Ass even had the audacity to ask one of my coworkers why I was leaving and my coworker told her directly that I wasn’t happy with the pay and maybe they should give me one.

After leaving, I continued to keep in contact with several of my former coworkers in the other departments, and they passed on the word to Fat Ass and Piggy that I found a job which almost pays twice as much as my previous crappy hourly wage…while I get a lot of downtime to work on my thesis at work. I feel sorry for all those who would have to eventually cater to Mr. Diva and his two sidekicks. My advice: If you’re ever caught in a position like this, you too should tell them to kiss your ass goodbye”

Stupid CoWorkers

“I could go on. Here’s three.

Temped in a textbook publisher’s marketing department, entering data to send out book samples to sales prospects, then I replace the supervisor, who goes out on maternity. They tell me she’s probably not coming back and nobody can train me. So I figure 75% of it out by myself and even write up procedures for the other temps they have doing the data entry work, so as to save on training time. Then I discover the product sampling process they use is years out of date, sending sample books to people who don’t want them and keeping them from the ones who do. I decide it needs fixing now and not only save them thousands of dollars a year in costs but probably make them several times that in new sales orders. Then the field sales reps I’m supplying realize that unlike my slacker predecessor, I stay late to make sure they always get samples to send their last-minute, narrowâ€window-of-opportunity prospects, instead of flipping them the bird and going home at 4:45. I’m a hero instantly, they’ve never been treated like human beings before, they go nuts, even the warehouse likes me. Jeez, maybe the company might not only hire me but pay me a decent wage, right?

New boss comes in and replaces the old one who had promised me a future there. For a week or two she’s nice enough. Then the afternoon she reads my resume, which includes an unavoidable indication of my non-mainstream religion, she flips from Jekyll to Hyde. She’s obviously something more traditional, because I become a leper overnight. She’s now hunting down every opportunity to find me doing something wrong, except I’ve been doing it much better than her buddy my predecessor, which pisses her off even more. She tries to ambush me in my office and catch me off guard with no use for any pleasantries like hello or see you. One day she pokes her head in my office for an ambush. “Did you finish this?”, she demands. “Er, yes, I did.” “What about that?!” “Uh, yes.” “Well what about that?” “Um, well, yes, I did that three days ago. We’re even trying to get ahead on the next task.” Icicles of disappointment begin forming off the doorjamb, and she turns and stomps off in a fury. My coworkers had gathered she’d taken a new turn on me, but some of them are still stunned. One of them waits to make sure she’s gone, then peers inside to see if I’m still alive. “I couldn’t believe that, and I was standing here and heard the whole thing! She was rude, she was abrasive, she was insulting…” A second person says, “Was that really J_____?” A third tries to laugh, “Face it, C____, she *really* doesn’t like you!” A fourth coworker, however (of my boss’s religious persuasion it seemed), goes into denial any of this happened, because the coworker had watched me staying thanklessly night after night later than even she did and commiserate, “C____, all your hard work will be rewarded, I promise!” Heh, it sure did. The boss brought back my predecessor, every job there I applied to afterward went nowhere, and back I went into temp land. And I’ve seen more than one temp made the scapegoat for some the incompetence of a regular employee.

Or the legal department of the big mutual fund company. Because of a former job, I know their obscure software better than any of them do, and I’m a top-rate proofer. One day I clock in at 9:00 a.m. and stay till 10 or 11 p.m. on deadlined paralegal stuff for them, skipping dinner because the project is so important. Not only do I get no overtime or recognition, they don’t even have the grace to send out for a pizza. A different lawyer boss I get at the same company tells me to put something in the ___ file. An hour later she goes looking for it and chews me out because it turns out there are two files by that name, and she never told me about the obscure but identically labelled on. I’m stupid, this is unacceptable, etc. Of course I make the mistake, since lawyers love power above all things, of mentioning I want to help them do things right, but she never informed me the other file existed. An hour later my agency calls me and tells me “it looks like they won’t be needing you after today” (and work then got really scarce for a month or two). Actually, I was getting indispensible to the point of being tech support for the entire *floor*, but this woman lusted for the opportunity to fire somebody who (a) was male, (b) had gone to an Ivy League school, and (c) knew her for her true colors. Dunno, maybe it really was her profession: her coworker went ecstatic when she “made” two million dollars selling some bonds back to an Indian tribe they’d bought them from only half a year before. Put differently, they soaked a poverty-ridden reservation out of either meager savings or forced them to sell assets to pay the debt. But I’m not sure either of them had souls.

Temping, done rightly, can be good practice for becoming a Dalai Lama. My next boss at a new worksite had gone through five assistants before me in one week, the agency told me to just try it for a day and see how it went, I didn’t have to take it if I didn’t want. She was definitely a type A, but completely un-self-aware and for whom business ethics were silly suggestions, but surprise, she got herself canned for her apparently legendary conduct (though after blackmailing the company for a $40,000 parachute first, which she probably should have paid them instead), and I outlasted her about three years till I left. Now the firm did string me out for cheap first with 364 days’ worth (notice the legal maximum?) of “indecision” over plans for our department before hiring me. It didn’t stop the conniving woman who stole my job shortly after I finally got it either, but in spite of misrepresentations behind my back I documented my productivity daily and managed to get one slightly better.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had bosses who were positive saints, especially in scale with their superiors, who in one place compromised the organization’s core principles (that one’s a page by itself). I had to resign from that one to keep my integrity, in spite of the fact it probably cost me hundreds of thousands of dollars in income in the long run, which I could sure have used and still could, though I don’t regret it one minute. (That was how I got to be a temp when other people lost their souls and kept their jobs.) But some of them made my current boss, in the grand scheme look tame. True, in spite of good points she sometimes loses stuff on her desk and then blames you all day long for losing it, or uses an interrogatory tone of voice when she’s demanding where her keys are, which is frequently (er, after two years of patient service you think I’m hiding them?) But even when you’ve been robbed, some of it looks relative.

Keep the faith; self-respect still counts for more than most people think.”

Stupid CoWorkers

“I work for a major medical school, Dept. of Psychiatry, and travel to state prisons to conduct psychiatric assessments of prisoners with mental health designations preparing to parole. Understand me: crazy and very dangerous men. In January, a corrections officer was murdered by a psych inmate and the state issued a state-wide emergency lockdown of all prisons, allowing entry to only “essential personnel.” I was inside a Level 4 (of 4) maximum security prison. Unbeknownst to me, the supervisors of my program phoned all my colleagues and ordered them to return home for their personal safety. Everyone except me. My phone was working, I was know to be in the prison, etc. Because I was known in the prison, I continued to work the full week, where it was tense, emotional, creepy. Inmates cheered the murder and corrections officers assaulted inmates. Trust me, I shouldn’t have been there. Upon return home and returning to the office, I was asked where I had been. I told them and my colleagues were shocked: “Didn’t you get the call?” Obviously not. It was disconcerting, to say the least, that I could be unaccounted for a full work week under a state-wide emergency conditions. At the staff meeting I made a very emphatic point about being left behind (a supervisor insisted she called & I immediately had my officemate call my cell phone to show it was operating), and I complained about not having the proper safety equipment (e.g. stab-proof vest), or the information necessary to make safety decisions in my best interest. The director said we will take this to a committee, and I said I would take it to my Union. Little of this has been resolved. 5 months later, I made a half-ass application for a supervisory position one hour before the process closed. I am by far the best trained and best experienced clinician in the program. The only other person who applied was a woman who is a knucklehead, no sense of evidenced-based medicine, uses “crystals”, “breath work,” shares personal information with sociopathic inmates trying to have a “connecting moment.” I believe they were pissed that I applied. This past thursday, I was called into the director’s office and served with “Written Warning” for “insubordination & unprofessional behaviour” because of the January staff meeting. When inquired why it took from January until June, they stated they had been too busy. Some of the issues included that I had called the supervisor “a name.” Whe I inquired as what it was, she stated, “naive.” The director asked if I was bold enough to tell the chairman of the Dept. of Psychiatry he was naive, and I responded “only if he were naive.” They were dramatically outraged. I offered to poll my peers as to their opinion, and was refused, and then suggested I would consult my attorney to depose everyone of my peers. At that point they were a bit more, shall we say, congenial. “Let’s not turn this into something contentious…” I ended this bullshit by saying, “You are playing me for a motherfucking fool; like I’m some chump from the street. Give me the paper and I’m gone.” They can’t fire me, but I certainly can’t be a supervisor with a disciplinary action. I’m no instigator, but don’t fuck with me.”