This happened tonight. A value meal has a drink, a fry, and a burger. Almost everybody knows that. But this guy. . .
I’m in drive thru and there’s a bing. I go: Hi, welcome to Sedro-Woolley Dairy Queen, go ahead and order whenever you’re ready.
Customer: Yes, I’d like a number one meal, the bacon cheddar, but instead of the drink, can I upsize my fries?
Me: So a large fry and a number one burger?
Customer: No, no, i want the meal, i just don’t want the drink.
Me: A meal without the drink is a fry and the burger.
Customer: No, you don’t understand. I want. The number one MEAL. But instead of a drink, I want to upsize my fries.
Me: And that would be a large fry and a burger.
Customer: A number one MEAL without the drink.
Me: <repeats> A large fry and a bacon cheddar burger. Customer: See, I want the meal. So, I want the large fry and the burger, but no drink. (pause) How would that be for my dog?
Me: <raises an eyebrow> I’m sorry. . . your dog???
Customer: Oh, my dog’s at home right now. He’s great. . .
Me: . . . . . . .Okay. . .so. . .A large fry and a bacon cheddar burger?
Customer: Well, is there anything you can do to take the drink off there?
Me: Well, I can ask my supervisor to see if I can take a dollar or something off for the drink, hold on a second.
Customer: See, i want the-
Me: <trying to talk to RSV> I’m sor-
Customer: -Bacon cheddar-
Me: I’ll be with you in just a moment!
Customer: Oh, okay
So i talk to RSV.
Me: Robert, this guy in my ear is a freak, he’s talking about his dog, and it’s freakin’ me out; He wants to take off some money from the value meal because he doesn’t want the drink.
RSV: Ask Suki.
Me: <turns to Suki> This guy wants a bacon cheddar meal without the drink and large fries instead.
Suki: Ring up a bacon cheddar burger and a large fry.
Me: I did, and the guy keeps saying it’s wrong!
Suki: Okay, just. . .humour him and just ring up a large fry and a bacon cheddar burger.
Me: <goes back to her station> So a large fry and a bacon cheddar burger.
Customer: I guess I can go with that, how much would it be?
Me: <says price>
Customer: WHAT?!!! That’s even more then the value meal!! You know what, here, i’ll come to the window and we’ll talk about this. Me: Okay. . . <as soon as the guy is out of my ear> Robert! You come talk to this guy, I’m not doing it, he’s freaking me out talking about his dog and stuff.
Jenny: Here, I’ll talk to him. <he comes up to the window and they argue> A value meal is a burger, a fry, and a drink. Customer: Yeah.
Jenny: You don’t want the drink and so that’s a large fry and a burger.
Customer: No, i want the meal! Ring it up as the meal.
Jenny: <shrugs and rings it up as the meal, telling him the price>
Customer: WHAT?!! I ONLY SAVE FIVE CENTS?!
Jenny: <doesn’t know what to say>
Me: That was how Suki had told me to ring it up.
Jenny: That was how her boss told her to ring it up.
Customer: Ah. . .YOU KNOW WHAT, forget it! I’M GOING TO THE COMPETITORS!!!
And then he sped off.
Note to customers – If you want a value meal with large fries and a burger, no drink, it is a fry and a burger. Sweet simplicity.
-Mearick