Stupid Bosses

August 18, 2006

I worked as a computer tech for an insurance company. One day I received a call from supervisor on the sales floor.

Me: “Hello, IT.”

Supervisor: “Hello?”

Me: “Hello?”

Supervisor: “Hello?”

Me: “Hello?”

The phone went dead. I put the phone down, and it rang again.

Me: “Hello, IT.”

Supervisor: “Hello, did you just ring me?”

Me: “No you rang me.”

Supervisor: “Did I? Oh, well, the reason I’m ringing now is because you couldn’t hear me when I rang you before.”

Me: “Yes I could.”

Supervisor: “No you couldn’t.”

Me: “Yes I could.”

Supervisor: “No you couldn’t.”

Me: “Believe me, I could.”

Supervisor: “Can you hear me now?”

Me: “Yes, of course I can.”

Supervisor: “Oh, that’s all right then. Catch you later.”

“““““

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Stupid Bosses
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Stupid Tech Support

August 8, 2006

Tech Support: “How may I help you today, sir?”

Customer: “Hello…hey, er…I think I’ve got the wrong software installed in my computer.”

Tech Support: “Why is that, sir?”

Customer: “I bought this minitower system from you, and it came loaded with software called the ‘XYZ Desktop’.”

Tech Support: “Yes…?”

Customer: “Shouldn’t it be called the ‘XYZ Minitower’? I OBVIOUSLY have the wrong software installed in this computer.”

Stupid Tech Support

Stupid Customers

August 2, 2006

Once I had a guy bring in two polaroid pictures of screen shots of his computer. He claimed they were “before” and “after” shots and wanted us to diagnose his computer problems by looking at the pictures. They looked the same to us — but we kept them and posted them in the back area with a $1000 dollar reward to anyone who could diagnose the problem that way.

Stupid Customers
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Stupid Salespeople

July 26, 2006

In a small computer store…

Me: “Hi. I need a 25 pin RS-232 cable.”

Sales Clerk 1: “What do you need it for?”

Me: “I need to plug a VT100 into a modem. I have both the VT100 and the modem, I just need at 25 pin male/female cable with RS-232 connectors.”

Sales Clerk 1: “Let me get my manager.”

Huh?

Sales Clerk 1: in background: “I have a guy here who wants to plug his VCR into a modem.”

The sales clerk returned with another.

Sales Clerk 2: “Hello, sir. You can’t attach a VCR to a modem.”

Me: “That is not what I am trying to do. I need a 25-pin RS-232 cable — that’s all. Do you have cables for plugging into modems?”

Sales Clerk 2: “What do you want to plug into the modem?”

Me: “A VT100. It is a terminal. You plug it into a computer over a serial line, frequently a modem. I just need a 25-pin cable to go from the unit to the modem.”

Sales Clerk 2: (to Sales Clerk 1) “He doesn’t have a VCR. He wants to plug a VTR into his modem, so it is all right.”

Sales Clerk 1 handed me a cable.

Me: “This is a 9-pin cable. I need a 25 pin cable.”

Sales Clerk 2: “Most PC’s have 9 pins on their serial cards.”

Me: “I am not attaching a PC. I am attaching a VT100. There are 25 pins on it — it needs to plug into a 25 pin connector.”

Sales Clerk 2: “Then use the small end to plug into your modem.”

Me: “There are 25 pins on the modem as well. Do you have any 25 pin cables? All I need is a cable with 25 pins at each end.”

Sales Clerk 2: “This is a 25 pin cable.”

Stupid Salespeople
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