(A mother and her teenage son come through my line…)
Me: “Hello, did you find everything you need?”
Mother: “Yes, we did.”
(I notice she is buying party items, including cups, soda, pizzas, napkins… and condoms.)
Me: “Oh, are you having a party soon?”
Mother: *nods* “My little James is growing up. He’s going to have an orgy with all his little friends, aren’t you Captain Muffinpants?”
Me: *suppresses laughter* “Will that be all?”
Son: “YES! YES THAT WILL BE ALL!” *runs to car*