Stupid Tech Support

Customer: “I have just received your software, but I have these plastic things, what are they?”

Tech Support: “Could you describe them please?”

Customer: “They are black plastic, thin, and square.”

Tech Support: “Anything else?”

Customer: “They have a metal bit on one edge.”

Tech Support: “Disks?”

Customer: “Well, I don’t know, do I? I just brought your package. What do I do with them?”

I see a horrible call ahead, and the customer is quite irate already.

Tech Support: “Put the disks in the drive.”

Customer: “What’s a drive?”

Tech Support: “The slot in your machine that looks just the right size for the disk.”

Customer: “Which machine?”

Tech Support: “Do you have a hard drive?”

Customer: “I have two boxes. One has a picture on it.”

Tech Support: “Put the first disk in, metal side first.”

Customer: “Ok. It’s gone in.”

Tech Support: “Go to the ‘start’ button, then run, then type ‘setup’.”

Customer: “My computer isn’t on. How do I turn it on?”

Tech Support: “Push the button by the drive to eject the disk, and press the button that says ‘power’ on the machine without the pictures on it.”

Customer: “Ok. Done.”

Tech Support: “Now put in the disk, go to start, run, and type ‘setup’.”

Customer: “Oh, it’s all working now. Thanks, but your software isn’t very easy to use, is it?”