Dear Office Sluts in the middle of the room:
We don’t really want to hear about how your latest conquest over the weekend thought you were a slut. Everyone else already knows you are. While you’re at it, if you want to get a job more suited to your talents, the stripper bars up the stairs are hiring. Til then, would it be too much to ask if you would shut the hell up and just work? Your office manners are more suited to happy hour than the workplace.