CoWorker that was getting dropped off at work: “I Love You, Have a Great Day”
CoWorker’s Wife in the car: “You’re an ASS, I HATE YOU!”
Stupid CoWorkers
CoWorker #1: She’s a Leslie.
CoWorker #2: Just because she wears a lot of plaid, doesn’t mean she’s a lesbian.
CoWorker #1: Her last name is Leeessssleeeeey.
Stupid Customers
I work at a store that sells area rugs. Here was a phone call I had:
Me: “[Store], this is [name].”
Customer on Phone: “Hello? I have a question. Can you help me?”
Me: “Yes, what is your question?”
Customer on Phone: “I can’t get it to stay up!”
Me: “Umm,okay. What do you mean?”
Customer on Phone: “My area rug! It’s old & I love this rug, but recently I can’t get it to stay up. The…what are they called? Fibers? They are all crushed and won’t stay up!”
Me: “Oh, I see.”
Customer on Phone: “I have been vacuuming it on all the different settings. It’s not as stiff and thick as it used to be. No matter how hard I suck, it just won’t stay up!”
Me: *trying to stay composed* “Alright, well that does tend to happen with age. Rugs tend to get pile-crushing after long periods of heavy traffic.”
Customer on Phone: “So, you’re telling me I can’t get it up because it’s old?!”
Me: “Yes, ma’am, that is exactly what I’m telling you.”
(I manage to keep it together for the rest of the conversation. However, my manager, who can hear the entire exchange, is cracking-up next to me the entire time)
Stupid CoWorkers
It was the start of fishing season. As with hunting season, to go out and fish one needed a license….
CoWorker #1:’ …oh, so you and Bob are going to go fishing this weekend? did you get your fishing licenses yet?’
CoWorker #2:’ …no not yet. I’m pretty nervous about it.’
CoWorker #1: (shakes her head) ..’why would you be nervous?’
CoWorker #2: ‘I’m afraid I’m not going to pass the test!’
CoWorker #3: ‘you don’t need to be nervous! There’s not a test! It’s just a thing where you pay a fee and fill in your name to register!’