Stupid Customers

Customer: “Hey there, can you help me find a book?”

Me:“Of course, ma’am. Do you know the author or title?”

Customer: “Well you see, I was at the beach and I saw this girl reading a purple book. She looked like she was really enjoying it! I want that book.”

Me: “Ma’am, you’re going to have to be more specific. There are a lot of books with purple covers.”

Customer: “Can’t you search on your computer for purple books?”

Me: “Unfortunately, no.”

Customer: “I’ll go to a bookstore that has better computers.”

Stupid Things Overheard

Woman to group: Do you any of you know Sally*?

Group members, shaking heads: No

Woman: Just as well, she just quit.

Stupid CoWorkers

Cubicle worker #1: I was just next to what I commonly refer to as a “master blaster” in the men’s john a minute ago…

Cubicle worker #2: Go on…

Cubicle worker #1: I think he barely had a chance to get his pants down before the gates of hell opened and all were consumed with fire and explosions of various forms…

Cubicle worker #1: I was trying not to laugh in the stall next door.

Cubicle worker #2: What the fuck!

Cubicle worker #1: It just goes to show. No matter how nice a person’s shoes, they can still be ugly on the inside. His shoes were very nice, after all. A black patent leather cap toe, I believe.

Cubicle worker #2: Everyone shits.

Cubicle worker #1: I didn’t get too good a look in my haste to retreat, lest I have to endure uncomfortable eye contact subsequently.

Stupid CoWorkers

Office Prank Gone Wrong….

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