Office woman #1: I guess no one objected to me tossing out their salad.
Office woman #2: Well, Jim did when I tossed his.
Office man #1: I really hope you guys are talking about a regular salad.
Office woman #2: No, I was talking about his ass.
Office woman #1: What? I don’t get it.
Customer: “Hello.”
Me: “Yes?”
Customer: “Where do you have–wait, did you say ‘Yes’?”
Me: *confused* “Excuse me?”
Customer: “I said ‘Hello,’ and you said ‘Yes.’ Is that what just happened here?”
Me: “I believe so.”
(She rolled her eyes and quickly walked out of the store.)
CoWorkers #1: Stop saying things like that! There are clients in here!
CoWorkers #2: All I said was “Ahr”!
CoWorkers #1: Yeah, but you said it really loud. And like a pirate!
Office guy #1: Sometimes I think it’d just be easier to be gay.
Office guy #2: Except for the butt sex.
Office guy #1: …I could take it.