We are on break at work and someone says something about men would be different if they had to go through delivery and one of the ladies there actually says “didn’t you see the paper the other night. A man did have a baby.” I said “what were you reading, the Globe.” And she gets offended. She also thinks you can get rid of warts by burying an old dish towel.
In the submarine force I have met many dumb people, but on my last ship, I met possibly the stupidest man alive. I realized this after watching the movie Schindlers list. after the movie, Dave Webb (known as dumb Dave) said, and I quote ” wouldn’t that suck if that really happened!” shortly thereafter my suspicions were confirmed when prior to arriving in Alaska, Dumb Dave asked ” Hey, Does anyone know the exchange rate in Alaska.” someone replied,” Yeah, It’s $2.00 to the bear claw.” and Dave asked him if he had any and he had any to spare and the other person said sure, no problem. Dave gave him $100.00 and the other person gave him back $50.00. Dave says “Hey these are not bear claws! Meanwhile everybody is in hysterics and Dave asks Why, so we go to let him off the hook and tell him that there is no exchange rate and he says “Really? What is Alaska a state or something? We say yes, not only a state but the largest in the US and he says “NO WAY!, I’m from Texas and I know for a fact that Texas is the largest!
Last week, I installed a computer for a co-worker. It was the very first computer she had ever used. She called me early the next morning and said her monitor was fuzzy looking and wanted to know if she needed to buy an antenna for it.
I told her no, it was cable ready.
A new technician was sent into the field to install a new video card. About the time they began to wonder if something was wrong, the technician called in. “I have the monitor apart, I just can’t figure out where to install the video card.”