Customer: “Well, I got one of your free disks in the mail, but I don’t have a computer. I just wanted to thank you for sending this to me.”
Tech Support: “…Ah…is that the only reason you’re calling, sir?”
Customer: “Yes, I just thought that was really nice of you people, sending me this disk. I really appreciate it!”
First of all, let me preface by saying that I am female. My roommate and I had a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship once upon a time, a LONG time ago, but since we hace just become good friends. I needed a place to live, and he invited to live in his extra bedroom of his house. I had never visited the house, but DESPERATELY needed a cheap place, so I accepted.
Upon arrival of my first visit, I discovered that my future room was actually quite similiar in size to a closet. I argued rent price, and got it down to less than half–since my room was less than half the size of his! I moved in in November, and everything was great–for awhile! Enter Crystal–my roommates so-called “girlfriend.”
Now my roommate is 22 years old–his girlfriend, when he started dating her, was still in high school, and not yet 18! After laughing at him when he told me, I discovered he was serious. Now this seemingly healthy relationship progressed, and everything was fine. Then all of a sudden, his little 18 year old is here ALL the time….these two have absolutely no life except for each other. She had no job at the time, but she has one now–about 5-6 months after mooching off him. But when they are not at work, their life consists of sitting around our house–monopolizing the couch which I purchased for use, but not sure I’ve ever actually used–going to Wal-Mart or Target, and going out to eat. Thats ALL. They only hang out with each other, and only do those things. They never pick up after themselves, they mess up the house which I have cleaned, and they like to have early morning sex in tha bathroom that we share, and make loud sounds to wake me up. I’ve exacted revenge, however, by playing the William Tell overture at full volume everytime they start going at it. But with the messiness, I totally understand your pain! They try to throw their empty wrappers and other things away, but the garbage can is just so hard to hit! And its unbelievably tough to wipe up your mess and just soak your dishes in the sink, after I’ve just cleaned the kitchen.
Anyway, thats the gist of my roommate situation. I’m in the process of selling my car so I can move into my own apartment. Thanks again for the amusing, yet oh so true website! Take care!
Sincerely, Beth
Texas law says that one must notify their victim 24 hours in advance of murdering or robbing them
Pennsylvania law states…”If you are driving your car and you encounter a group of wild horses, you must pull over and cover your car with a camouflage tarp (not sure about the spelling for camouflage). If the horses seem nervous you disassemble your car piece by piece and hide it in a ditch.
In Macomb Illinois it is illegal to drive a car that is shaped like a wolverine.
Several Months Ago, One of My Officers Was Dispatched to a Local Grocery Store in Regard to a Burglary Which Had Just Occurred. The Officer Gathered a Description of the Suspect and Broadcast it to Responding Officers. It Was Later Learned the Suspect Had Taken Several Cans of Coffee. Two Solo Officers and Myself Later Arrived in the Front of the Store and Were Waiting to Speak with the Reporting Officer When He Exited the Store. We Now Had Four Police Units Parked Directly in Front of the Store. To Our Suprise, We Saw a Subject Matching the Description of Our Suspect Approaching the Store on a Bike. The Suspect Rode in Front of the Store and Crashed into a Water Dispenser. This Caught the Attention of All Those Around. He Managed to Upright Himself and Again Began to Ride Toward the Entrance of the Store. This Time He Went Approximately Five Feet Before He Crashed into a Soda Machine. (Turns out the Suspect Was under the Influence of Heroin and Alcohol). As Amazed as I Was, I Was Able to Radio to the Reporting Officer to Tell Him the Suspect Was about to Enter the Store. The Suspect Saw the Officer Inside to the Store but Continued Through the Door. The Cashier Immediately Identified the Suspect. I Entered the Store Behind the Suspect and Saw the Stolen Coffee Cans Protruding from His Coat Pockets. The Suspect Was Placed under Arrest and Was Found to Be in Possession of a Small Amount of Methamphetamine. When Asked Why He Returned to the Store, the Suspect Stated He Had Left Behind a Drawing He Did Not Want Traced Back to Him. We Located this Drawing Which Had No Identifying Marks on it Which Could Have Lead Us to Our Brilliant Criminal.