Stupid Salespeople

I was in our University Bookstore the other day looking at software when I overheard a salesman talking to a lady about an iMac.

Salesman: “It has a built in color monitor and comes with a mouse and keyboard–”

Customer: “Does this thing come with a battery backup system?”

Salesman: “No, but we have one over there for $99.00. Do you have problems with power outages?”

Customer: “No, but I don’t want to lose all of my Microsoft documents everytime I turn off the computer!”

Salesman: “You don’t need a battery backup for that. That’s why it has a 4 gigabyte hard drive.”

Customer: “A hard what?”

Salesman: “A hard drive. It’s like a whole bunch of floppy disks inside your computer that you can store documents on.”

Customer: “I want the battery backup.”

Salesman: “You don’t need it.”

Customer: “Why?”

Stupid Tech Support

I’ve done my time in tech support and have managed to live through some very weird calls, but this one was the best. An older lady bought a brand new desktop system with all the extras and had been using it for about a month when she got an error about an “illegal function.” She took apart the whole system down to the hard drive and hid it in different parts of her house, called us, and wanted to know how much longer she had until the police were going to come get her. Needless to say, we spent a lot of time on the phone putting the system back together.

Stupid Things Overheard

Teen girl: Have you ever wondered why there are no, like, sexy midgets?

Friend: No, but sometimes I wonder if you are slightly retarded.

Stupid Things Overheard

Woman #1: I was dreaming that I was dreaming that I was awake but wanted to take a nap. So I did and I started dreaming. Then I woke up… but I was still asleep!

Woman #2: Wow.