Boss: What are you going to do on your lunch break?
Assistant: I think I might go outside and spread my legs.
Boss: Pardon?
Assistant: I said I think I might go outside and stretch my legs. (walks off very quickly)
Stupid Things Overheard
Client in high end salon to receptionist: I’ve got to ask you: how do you keep such a fabulous year-round tan?
Receptionist, giving blank stare: I’m half black.
Stupid Things Overheard
Waiter: There’s a fly buzzing around. I kept him off your food.
Manager: Ah, it doesn’t matter. Nobody ever died from that.
Waiter: Nobody ever died from licking my balls, either. You want to come over here and do that?
Stupid Things Overheard
Woman at office party: She’s got that psychological syndrome where she uses sex to get what she wants from men… What do they call that again?
Man: A whore.