Suit #1: Hey, did the DB team ever send you that data for your report?
Suit #2: No.
Suit #1: Can’t you just make up the numbers?
Suit #2: I would, but I already made up 60% of the numbers in the report.
Suit #1: 60%?
Suit #2: Yeah, generally 40% of the numbers in a report have to be accurate. It’s an accepted standard.
“““““
Patron: Will the bank will be open on Friday?
Teller: Yes sir, we are open. Why shouldn’t we be?
Patron: I heard it will be very cold Thursday and Friday.
Teller: No sir, we don’t close the bank due to cold weather. How can I help you?
Support staff: Hello, how can I help you?
Caller: Can I speak to Nora?
Support staff: I’m sorry, there is no Nora in this office.
Caller: I called yesterday too.
Support staff: Yes, I remember. There was no Nora yesterday, either.
Worker #1: Oh, I love that ringtone! That’s from Wizard of Oz, isn’t it?
Worker #2: Yeah, Ding-Dong! The Witch Is Dead is my favorite song in that whole movie.
Worker #1: Who called?
Worker #2: My mother-in-law.
Worker #1, lauhging: Got any others?
Worker #2: Yeah, I’ve got If I Only Had a Brain on there, too.
Worker #1: Who’s that one for?
Worker #2: My boss.