I work for Iomega tech support. One day, when I was answering the AOL message board questions, I ran across a letter complaining that this person’s zip drive had ejected a zip disk clear across the room and hit her dog in the eye. The dog supposedly lost vision in that eye and wanted Iomega to pay for the vet bill. I wrote back asking for a picture of the injury. I got back a picture of a dog wearing a pirate patch.
There was a really angry user who called me, saying my company was @#$!# and its products were !@#$@, and I was @#$*! too. He said he bought our graphics card, and it didn’t work, and what the @&$!# was I going to do about it before he sued my lying butt.
After this I learned from him that he didn’t actually have our product.
Email from a customer:
I’ve bought a stolen CDD3610 which didn’t come with any software or cables. Could you please send that to me? I presume I do have the full 12 months warranty?
Customer: “I’m having trouble installing Microsoft Word.”
Tech Support: “Tell me what you’ve done.”
Customer: “I typed ‘A:SETUP’.”
Tech Support: “Ma’am, remove the disk and tell me what it says.”
Customer: “It says ‘[PC manufacturer] Restore and Recovery disk’.”
Tech Support: “Insert the MS Word setup disk.”
Customer: “What?”
Tech Support: “Did you buy MS word?”
Customer “No…”