Stupid Customers

I was working tech support for a university when I got this call:

Tech Support: “Hello, tech support.”

Customer: “I am ready to send.”

Tech Support: “What?”

Customer: “I am ready to send.”

Tech Support: “What are you ready to send?”

Customer: “The file I am uploading. I am ready to send.”

Tech Support: “Ooooh-kay…what are you sending?”

Customer: “I am submitting a file to you. I selected ‘upload,’ and it said, ‘Ready to receive, waiting for signal,’ so I called you, giving you my signal, so you can begin getting it.”